Hi friends! This week during a one-on-one meeting with one of my day job coworkers I said, “The burned-out in me recognizes the burned-out in you.” We laughed but I immediately felt a shift in our energy as we both acknowledged that we each have very little to give lately. It definitely decreased the amount of pressure I was feeling to prove that I am on top of everything (I am not).
I have had so much going on during my work days that it has been leaving me absolutely fried and unable to do most things during the evenings and weekends. My work day involves being on the computer all day. My writing and many things I want to do in the evenings and on weekends also involve being on the computer, which is often the last place I want to be. So then I tinker around and maybe do a little tidying (emphasis on little) and end up staring at my phone.
Then, at the end of the evening or weekend I tell myself, “Well, you tried but it seems like your brain needed that rest and to zone out.” This is a fine thing to say sometimes and by no means am I saying that I (or any of us) needs to be productive at all waking moments; however, when I say this night after night and weekend after weekend, how much is it “My brain needs rest” and how much is it plain ol’ avoidance? Shutting down? Dissociating? Which hey, I read over a hundred books a year. I’m all for escapism! But is it really escaping when I’m scrolling through my feeds mindlessly? On top of that, how do I feel after I do that? Do I feel good and refreshed? Has my motivation returned? Or do I just feel depleted?